Kindness Corner

As you can tell, it's been a while since my last post. I've had a few issues with the site, coupled with - what else - a nasty flu virus that kept me a little quiet on the blogging front. So here I am today, almost healed, with an incredible outlook for 2012.  I'm already certain that 2012 will be the best year of my life. (Of course, next to my wedding day and the days our lovely daughters were born.) Now, you may ask how can I be so certain and there are a few reasons. For starters, on a daily basis since the beginning of the year, I have been touched by many kindnesses. I've had complete strangers push my shopping cart through a snow drift, I've had people go out of their way to do something kind for me, I've connected with old friends and some incredible new ones and I count myself lucky each and every day that I'm alive because each and every day is one spent as a mother and wife, a neighbour, friend, coworker, fellow shopper - each function which gives me just another opportunity to give love.  And isn't that what it's about? If you say no, I challenge you to look at your own life and see what has been accomplished without great love. Talent. Relationships. Nothing positive is never accomplished without love for something.  So I really didn't set out to make a resolution for 2012.... I just committed myself to giving a little more love each and every day to everyone in, and soon to be in my life - whether they know it or not.

So, in the spirit of Valentine's Day tomorrow, let's all give a little love. Or a lot. (And tell us about it.)

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I guess I should start this one with a quick snapshot of what 2011 was like for us: we moved across 2 provinces, experienced 3 bouts of pneumonia, baby measles, bronchitis, strep, some nasty stomach bug that we then passed on to 49 of 50 people at our house, and last week - the norwalk virus.  Mix in 2 vacations when the girls were moderately healthy and there you have it.  We've managed to remain a close family with most of our sanity intact and still love one another enough to want to spend even more time together - crazy, I know.  Today, in thinking of the fresh year ahead of us, I am thankful for my incredible husband, 2 beautiful babies, wonderful friends and (mostly) wonderful family.  With all this, how could we ever have anything less than a memorable 2012? Today, a glimpse of 2012 looks like this: 3 weddings that we're very excited for, a 60KM walk in support of women's cancer (go to http://www.endcancer.ca/site/TR/Events/Calgary2012?px=1091178&pg=personal&fr_id=1460v  to donate) and a promised Disney trip to our soon to be 5 year old. As a marketing professional, I admittedly need to do some tweaking on this site, but for now it is what it is but it will get a nice little face lift - good household health permitting. So, to all my close and unknown friends and fellow Samaritans out there, happy 2012 and I hope you'll join me in my quest to spread the spark of kindness. Then everyone's 2012 WILL be memorable.

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We love to travel with our children, possibly because I can't live without them, possibly because we love watching their reactions to new experiences.  Today, we're on our last night of an almost 2 week stay in Jamaica where I've developed a new respect for land. Like middle of the prairies, surrounded by either cattle or skyscraper land.  Here goes....

A few days ago, after a few vodka sodas, I convinced myself that I needed to go deep sea fishing.  While my brain was on a dizzy hiatus, my husband booked our trip. When I sobered up, I'll admit that I was more than a bit scared at the idea, but equally as excited to try it out.

When we got to the dock, a Jamaican named Nicholas helped us onto the boat shortly before telling us that the waters were quite "choppy" that day and proceeded to give us waivers releasing them of any responsibility if we drowned. Hmmm....

There we were, thirty minutes into our trip, riding waves twice the height of the boat when I started feeling nauseous. Nicholas told me to keep my eye on the island and I would feel better. Surely this would be easy if the boat wasn't going vertical and we weren't riding the equivalent of the 'Andrea Gail' into the 'Perfect Storm. (Great movie! Check it out!) When I couldn't see land anymore and when the boat seemed to struggle on a significant vertical incline, I decided to go inside, thinking it might make me feel better. Bad decision.

The moment I got inside, I started vomiting, but I couldn't find anywhere to dump it so I closed my mouth, frantically trying to open the garbage can.  A fellow fisherman saw my predicament and followed me inside. As the boat dipped about 15 feet and rose a good 30, Randy - a bearded man in his 60s from Wyoming kicked open what would be my puke bucket for the next 5 hours. Meanwhile, my husband was trying to get to me but almost got thrown off the boat doing so. (Yes, it was that crazy out there.)

Long story short, we survived and my husband caught a trophy mahi mahi. Would I go again? Definitely.  Next time, however, I will wait for calmer waters and take copious amounts of gravol.  So to Randy, the fisherman from Wyoming, thank you for your courtesy. If it weren't for him, the boat would have been one hell of a mess. Not only did you save my pride, but my sanity as well.

Sometimes we just need someone to hold the bucket for us. Glad he did.

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I love shopping. For anything, really. Shoes. Bread. Gum. Each year, my husband and I start Christmas shopping in August so we can not only get gifts for the 40 or so people on our list, but get them fantastic gifts at affordable prices. We were at good ole' Walmart for stocking stuffers the other day and I think everyone in the store that day had the Christmas spirit. No one pushing you around to get to 'the goods'. No one grumpy. In fact, everyone was pretty jovial.  So there we were, in the checkout line when our little peanut started laughing out loud. I turned to see 2 college kids making faces at her, but pretending not to. The funny thing was that they were really going out of their way to make her laugh - crossing their eyes, sticking out their tounges, doing the 2-fingered rabbit ears behind their heads.   I assume the 2 guys were roommates, and definitely childless, but their simple effort really made my baby girl's day. ( Mine too.) So, in the spirit of Christmas and holiday cheer, lets all cross our eyes in the face of negativity. People might think you're crazy, but don't the crazy people have more fun?

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I suppose I should tell you a little about my job and what it means for my family. A little over three weeks ago, I started working for Sobeys in the Marketing department. (For those of you outside of Canada who have never heard of it, it's a large national grocery chain.)  Now, we could debate for hours on whether I should actually say the name or leave you guessing. I chose the former because not only do I love my job, but I'm finding that I'm really enjoying the type of company I work for.  I decided to go back to work primarily because I needed conversation that didn't center on diapers and cartoons, but I did so on my own terms. I had to work close to home. Check. I wasn't willing to work the million hours previous jobs required of me. Check. I wasn't willing to work in a stressful environment. Check. My family is my priority and, as you can tell by the never-ending saga of illness, I needed to work somewhere that allowed me to not only be a mom, but an attentive one. Check. If I could only figure out how to keep my house clean instead of the bomb it has happened to become since I started working, life will be perfect. I suppose the reason I'm letting you into my little world is because - whether you know it or not - you're part of it. You're the person who let me pass in traffic. You're the person who opened the door when I had no hands because I was holding my girls. You're the person who smiled, or listened, or waved hello .....just because you could. Some of you reading this might say..."whoa! That's not my world! People just aren't that nice to me. "  But I'm here to say, it is if you let it be. Most often all it takes is the recognition, a constant frame of awareness, that people are affecting your life positively. Sometimes, however, we need to be the catalysts of this movement because our actions, whether we know it or not, are exponential in terms of impact. Even the smallest ones. (Like a ripple in a pond, for the best over-used analogy I could think of.)  So, make your move. Make it a good one. And watch........

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So, if you've visited the site in the last few weeks, you've noticed nothing much has been happening. Not that kindness has stopped, but I've been on a sort of hiatus while nursing my daughers back to health - AGAIN. My one year old developed pneumonia for the 4th time in the last year. Not so fun. Add to that two new molars in her young little mouth and a few ugly days of fevers with my four year old. Needless to say, we've been on yet another incredble sleepless journey together and I almost lost sight of the bigger picture. Almost, but not quite. I do count myself incredibly lucky that my family is healthy. With all of our visits to the hospital over the last few months, I've had the unfortunate opportunity to see many, many people much sicker than any of us, many of whose misforunes will never go away like ours do. Coincidentally, this also happened to be the time I decided to go back to work and started a new job for a large company. Every day of my first week, my new boss and coworkers were genuinely concerned about our well-being. Possibly because I looked like a zombie, maybe because I acted like one after the 4th consecutive day of having no more than 4 hours of sleep. Whichever the case, I count myself lucky that not only do I enjoy the work, but do so in an environment condusive to a happy home life. So, now that my daughters are on the mend and I'm ever so slowly working my way out of the depths of sleep deprivation....I'm back, and I'm looking for stories. I know you have them, so please, please share with us.

Sleep well.

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After two weeks of severe illness (once again), and my first experience with 20 feet of projectile vomit and 20 puke footprints all over my house, I have decided to get the flu shot. My girls and I will be the first in line once we wait a few days to make sure there are no side effects from the travel immunizations we had yesterday.  Now, with nearly 3 months of illness haunting my house, and after copious amounts of red wine and tylenol (not together), I am calmer with the fact that I can't stop these kinds of things from happening. Sure, I can wash my hands, live in a bubble, etc, but we will get sick again at some point in our lives. Living the last few months, I've realized that besides the hand sanitizer, thermometer, drugs, and kleenex, a positive attitude may not cure what ails us, but definately makes the going a little easier, for everyone involved. During the last few months, complete strangers have helped me in infinate ways, as family and friends have done the same.  These are the times that I count myself as truly blessed to be where I am in my life with the people that surround me. All I have to do is read about others' misfortunes, or walk past someone less fortunate and a part of me always reaches out to them, wants to help them, would give as much as I could to make that person's life better.  I literally get goosebumps when I think about helping someone. It's the kind of high that I've lived off of since I was a kid and the kind of drug that will keep me going in my old age. And then I wonder, do the strangers that help me get the same feeling? I believe so, in varying degrees.  So, whether or not this website means anything to you, I know you've only read this far because kindness does.  Let's keep it going.

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The other day, a friend shared a video with me that I haven't been able to get out of my mind.  I'm sharing it because it is a shining example of how, with a little kindness, we can rise above almost any situation. Check it out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W86jlvrG54o

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I love talking to strangers. Really. I find new people absolutely fascinating and I love learning about their lives and the cool things they do.  The other day, while Bekah was in preschool, I found myself at Michael's crafts buying one of those Halloween gingerbread houses. I figured Laura and I would be in for just a minute so I didn't bother taking the stroller in with me, nor did I use a cart. So there I was, Laura on one hip, Haunted House (in-the-making) on the other, and there was some type of hold up in front of me at the register.  While Laura is not the biggest of babies, she does get quite heavy after a while - that's only if I can maintain a grip on her as she throws herself at every blinking, squeaking, howling and moving object in the store.  I must have been standing there, struggling for only a minute or two when a woman walked up to me with her cart and said, simply, "here, let me take that for you", and she took the box out of my hands so I could get a better hold of Laura.  She didn't wait for me to politely decline. She gave me a knowing smile and immediately took the extra baggage off my hands and held it for me until it was my turn to pay.  We ended up talking about our families for a while and I told her she reminded me of one of my best friends. (Had I been in the store any longer, she might just ended up as one of them!)  See? Good deeds not only make you feel better, but they can make you feel as if you have an incredible extended family.  (We have been blessed with incredible friends and my husband and I count ourselves lucky to have so many kind, caring, and selfless people in our lives.) These kinds of connections go on to nuture others of the sort and if we really put effort into it, we'll find that the world just isn't so small after all.

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Stop me if you've heard this one: "It's not what you know, it's who you know.", "must be nice", "that stuff only happens to other people", "I wish". These comments, and similar complaints are just that....complaints. Like weeds, they invade our thoughts, taking up room and choking out more productive, positive thoughts.  I hear words like this on a daily basis and I  think one of the most interesting things about it is that these words always come from people who are not happy with their lives. They need more money, better health, a new job and the list goes on but no amount of luck will give them any of it and so the complaints go on...and on...and on.  (As do their misfortunes.) If, however, we change our thinking - one positive thought at a time - these complaints become something more like "I did it", "good for them", "I can't believe my luck" - none of which is the result of luck but that of positivity.  The same can be said for kindness. If we're in a negative mindset all the time, it's hard to recognize when someone is kind to us. It we first adopt a smile before we adopt judgement, it's always easier to notice these things and, in turn, pay it forward.  Life shouldn't be a constant complaint. Rather, it should be a relationship of joy.

And have you ever heard someone complaining about kindness? Think about it.

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